the back of a police car
by M3GAN
Summary: Duos curious ways get him and Heero into a lot of trouble. And A couple others come in to join them. Poor Trowa...


I don't own gundam wing.  
  
Heero and Duo are walking down the street. The girls told them to go to the store and pick up some milk. But Heero's car mysteriously disappeared, so they had to walk... But along the way, on the side of the road. A police car is parked half way on the curb with the lights flashing. On a nearby lawn, a truck has been rolled into a backyard. Nobody is around, but shouts and gunfire is heard about a block away.  
  
Duo grins and approaches the car "cool!". He pulls on the handle and is surprised when it opens.  
  
"Duo!" Heero scolds.  
  
"whoops," Duo closes it. Then, that youthful curiosity gets the better of him, and he walks to the drivers side of the car and opens that door. Ignoring his friends warnings, he sits in the drivers seat and places his hands on the steering wheel, pretending to drive it.  
  
"get out! Do you know what will happen if you're caught in there?!" Heero yells from outside the door.  
  
"eh, probably just a slap on the wrist." Duo waves it off and starts jolting the steering wheel back and forth making engine noises.  
  
Heero opens the passenger side door and gets in ".wow.. Roomy!" He says looking around the interior of the cruiser.  
  
About five minutes later they are both cops in an imaginary high-speed chase.  
  
"the suspect has just turned onto the interstate and is going AGAINST traffic," Heero says into the hand radio.  
  
Duo continues 'driving'.  
  
"okay, he's back on the right side of the road. Close all traffic to this area and set up a spike strip!" Heero says.  
  
"what?" the radio answers, making Heero drop it in shock.  
  
Duo laughs.  
  
A tapping on the window gets Duos attention. He looks and sees an officer standing outside. Duo looks at Heero, then rolls down the window "o- officer?".  
  
Two minutes later. Heero and Duo are sitting in the back of the now moving car.  
  
"you're an idiot." Heero growls.  
  
"I know." Duo says leaning forward and putting his head on the glass separating them from the two officers in the front.  
  
The officer in the passenger side turns and looks at them "so you two were INSIDE this car when you were caught?" he says trying to hold back snickers.  
  
Heero glares at him for laughing at him ".my 'friend' here was exploring the cab, being the retard that he is.".  
  
"Hey! You were in here too!" Duo complains.  
  
Heero turns his glare to Duo.  
  
"well, well. what do we have here?" the driving officer muses, pulling the car over behind a parked green car with a black haired boy sticking a coat hanger in the window "Cherryl, I believe we have a 9-11" he says, stepping out of the car and approaching the boy.  
  
Duo looks at Heero" what's a 9-11?".  
  
Heeor shrugs.  
  
Duo pauses and starts sniffing the air.  
  
Heero scowls at him "what are you doing?".  
  
"I smell *sniff* something *sniff* good!" he says scanning the front seats.  
  
Heero smells the air as well "*sniff* it's like. *sniff* bread.".  
  
"donuts!!" Duo squeaks excitedly, His face pressed against the glass looking at a box of donuts in between the front seats.  
  
Heero's eyes widen in shock as Duo's arm snakes through the space in the glass "are you crazy!?". He grabs Duo by the shoulders and pulls him back to his seat.  
  
"I'm starving!" He whines and gets up again for another try.  
  
Heero sighs. As if they weren't in ENOUHG trouble ".well.. Get me one too".  
  
"no problem-o" Duo says. But before he could get any farther, the cops slam the boys chest down hard on the front of the car, making Duo jump back. They see Wufei's angry face yelling something at the cops as they hand-cuff him and read him his rights.  
  
"It's MY car! I just forgot my keys inside! Get off me!!! What are you? Gay?!" He insults the cop holding him down with his own body. He pauses when he sees Duo and Heero in the back seat staring at him "aw hell.".  
  
After Wufei is thrown in the back with the other two pilots.  
  
Wufei looks at them "what are you two doing here? They gonna throw you in the slammer for LITTLERNG!?" he aims the last bit at the two cops.  
  
Heero opens his mouth to correct him, but posses ".yea.. Yea, that's it.".  
  
After about ten minutes of listening to the radio, the cop radio speaks up "officers, we have report of the suspect from earlier has been spotted about a block away from your current location. He's on Deliware Bay heading North. Driving a black Chevrolet Corvette".  
  
"were on our way," the cop says into the receiver on the hand held radio.  
  
"cool!!" Duo shouts excitedly. "do we get to be in a real cop chase?!" Duo says through the opening in the glass.  
  
"yes, hold tight back there" the passenger seat cop warns "there's handles above the windows".  
  
"hey! What am I supposed to do?!" Wufei complains, having his hands cuffed behind his back.  
  
Duo grins "duck?".  
  
Heero sighs, annoyed and switches places with Duo so he is in the middle. Then he holds onto Wufei while holding the handle.  
  
The sirens scream loudly as the car picks up its speed. They see the black car swerving around other cars on the highway trying to get away from its cop pursuers.  
  
Heeros eyes widen with terror and shock.  
  
Duo sees Heeros expression "what's wrong with you?".  
  
"that's my car!" He yells.  
  
Duo laughs "aw that sucks!".  
  
The Chevy drives up onto the curb, rattling the suspension and making it squeak. Then a cop car tries to manipulate it into the ditch, mangling the back end. The car finally spins around out of control and rolls onto the roof then slowly back onto all four tires. Then, by a one to a thousand chance, it keeps moving.  
  
"WOW!!!" Duo says excitedly with his face pressed up to the side window "DID YOU SEE THAT?!?!?" He yells to nobody in particular.  
  
"no, we didn't" one cop jokes.  
  
Duo smiles at his joke then continues watching. While all this time Heero is almost in tears over his poor car.  
  
The chase continues down a back road with the Corvette's bumper dragging behind it and the roof caved in. Then, in a burst of light, fire emerges from the front and the driver pulls over to the side of the road and runs from the car, before it explodes. The cops get out and chases him, out of sight.  
  
They are left alone to watch Heero's car erupt into larger flames.  
  
Duo rubs Heeros back to comfort him.  
  
They hear gunshots from the trees and seconds later the driver emerges from the trees and runs, with a limp, towards the car.  
  
"he killed the cops!!" Duo shouts.  
  
The driver gets in and starts the car. In the rear view mirror Duo sees the drivers face "TROWA??!?!".  
  
Wufei and Heero look at Duo shocked "what?".  
  
Trowa looks at them over his shoulder while backing the car up "shut up! I don't know what they can hear in these cars. You might give them my name!".  
  
"what the hell are you doing Barton!?" Wufei demands.  
  
Trowa looks him over "me? YOU'RE the one in the back of a police car!".  
  
"YOU'RE the one that just stole and totalled my brand new Corvette!" Heero argues.  
  
"oh, yea." Trowa shrugs "it was a sweet car, I couldn't resist.".  
  
"Yea, it was!" Duo tells Heero as if it'd make it better "6 speed, 170 mph tops. goes 0-60 in 4.7 seconds. 345 horses. Trowa! You retard!".  
  
Trowa turns to say something, but is cut off by a cop shouting "look! There he is! Get out of the car!!".  
  
"uh ho.." Trowa slams on the gas while in reverse, swinging the front of the car around and speeding off in the direction they came.  
  
On the road.Trowa looks at Duo in the mirror "Duo?".  
  
"yea?".  
  
"are you hungry?" he asks casually.  
  
Duo, puzzled by the off topic question ".yea, why?".  
  
Trowa reaches into his wallet and pulls out his I.D "eat this" he says sticking it through the opening in the glass.  
  
"no!" Duo protests.  
  
"yeah, mine too." Heero says handing his to Duo as well.  
  
"can you get mine out Heero?" Wufei asks turning his back more to the brown haired boy.  
  
"guys! I-" Duo starts, but he's cut off by Trowa.  
  
"just DO IT! Do you want this to go on record?".  
  
".no." Duo whimpers as he accepts everyone's cards. He looks at them all "how am I supposed to EAT these?" feeling the stiff lamination on all of them.  
  
"I don't know, just bite into them!" Heero instructs.  
  
Duo begins gnawing on Heeros I.D.  
  
Wufei cant help but laugh.  
  
"oh. and this too?" Trowa says holding up a small plastic bag containing a whitish- green powder.  
  
"TROWA!" they all yell.  
  
Trowa shrugs.  
  
"YOU eat it!" Heero barks at him angrily.  
  
"I can't! I'm driving!" Trowa says. He throws the bag into the back with them and it lands on Duos lap.  
  
Duo rolls his eyes and begins emptying its contents into his mouth.  
  
"Trowa?" Heero asks, all of a sudden worried.  
  
"yo?" Trowa says, not looking away from the road.  
  
"you think I should get rid of this?" he says holding up his handgun.  
  
"oh. I forgot about these." Trowa says holding up his own gun.  
  
They all think. Then Wufei's face brightens up "Maxwell! Remember that story you told me about when you stole that little golden horse thing?".  
  
"yeeeaaa?." Duo responds, feeling the effect of the mary-J. His eyes are half closed and he has a lopsided grin on his face.  
  
"how you hid it when the store security caught you?" He continues hoping Duo will catch on.  
  
".dude! No way!" snaps back at him.  
  
"what?" Heero asks looking at the braided boy.  
  
A police car rams the side of the stolen cruiser and Trowa struggles to keep control of the car.  
  
"whatever it is, do it fast!" Heero urges handing his gun to Duo.  
  
Duo stares at him, then realises there's no way to get out of it. He takes the gun and puts it down on the seat beside him, then un-does his pants and starts sliding them down.  
  
Heero watches curiously.  
  
Duo then starts pulling down his underwear.  
  
"Duo, they'll search your underwear and- .oh.." He makes a sick face and gags.  
  
"I have no choice!" Duo defends his. disgusting actions.  
  
"what's he doing?" Trowa asks, not having a chance to look. When he does "AWW! Duo!" he looks away.  
  
Duo laughs as he continues.  
  
When he's done with the first gun, he shifts un-comfortably in his seat.  
  
"Duo." Trowa hands him his gun.  
  
"guys! I only have one ass!" Duo complains, holding his stomach.  
  
"Heero? Wufei?" Trowa looks at the said pilots.  
  
Heero raises his hands "way too grose.".  
  
"no!".  
  
"just.. Throw it out the window!" Duo says, unsure of himself.  
  
"they'll find it!" Trowa argues.  
  
"they'll find it if you're holding it too! Besides, they might not see it if you chuck it." Duo reasons.  
  
"well. here goes nothing." Trowa rolls down his window and casually slips the gun out the window and looks away as if nothing happened.  
  
One of the pursuing cars screeches to a stop.  
  
"shit!" Trowa says looking out the back window.  
  
"Duo!" Heero yells angrily.  
  
Duo shrinks into his seat.  
  
"guys, we have a problem." Trowa says worriedly. In the near distance officers are trying to hide on either side of the road.  
  
"what are they gonna do?" Duo asks "jump us?".  
  
Trowa screeches the hand break throwing the car around in the opposite direction, then accelerates past the following police cars.  
  
Duo gets up off the floor where he had fallen "nice move!" he comments.  
  
"thanks". Trowa speeds up, out manoeuvring all on coming attacks from other cars. Finally, a couple miles later, the engine burns out and the car rolls to a dead stop. Police cars screech on their breaks and surround the idle vehicle so it can't escape and cops point their guns at Trowa using car doors as shields "get on the ground and keep your hands where we can see them!" they warn. Trowa does so and lets himself be taken, seeing as he is out numbered and too worn out to fight back.  
  
Sitting in the back seat, forgotten about, the three boys wait for a few minutes.  
  
".aw, screw this!." Heero sticks his arm out the broken window and opens the car door from the outside. Then sneaks away, followed by Duo. "we didn't do anything anyways.".  
  
Wufei, still in handcuffs, manages to slide out the open door and slink away in another direction into some bushes.  
  
Later that night, back at the safe house with Quatre, Milliardo, Noin, and the girls. Duo and Heero came home like nothing happened earlier, later followed by Wufei who used the blow torch in the garage to break the cuffs.  
  
Someone rings the doorbell. Milliardo answers it to be faced with a cop holding Trowa's shoulders, whom is in handcuffs like Wufei was. Trowa looks up at Milliardo wearily ".I...am so. So sorry.".  
  
The end  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
M3GAN: lol, wonder where that came from!  
  
Trowa (on his hands and knees scrubbing the floor): cop shows, NEWS, drag racing Nintendo games, that one ps2 game 'grand theft auto'.  
  
Milliardo: I hear talking, but I don't hear scrubbing!  
  
Trowa glares at him. Then continues scrubbing.  
  
Noin: and what were you doing with that bag of pot?  
  
Heero: you owe me a very expensive car!  
  
Quatre: you're not allowed to go out after 9:00pm..  
  
Duo (looking amazed at his hands): O.o  
  
Milliardo: you're going to be washing dishes for the rest of your life, boy!  
  
Trowa(to himself): joke's on him, this is actually way better than the circus!  
  
Duo: and isn't it kinda suspiscious how M3GAN knows EXACTLY what the back of a police car looks like?  
  
M3GAN smiles.  
  
Quatre: -.-"  
  
Review please!!! 


End file.
